Travel-lodges...

Wow. Wow and Wow.

Let me set the scene for you. It’s about 6:30pmish on a Thursday I’m in a travel lodge in west Edinburgh. I've been here for the last few days and I’ve seen a fair few things in this bar/lobby/restaurant/cafe.

• Screaming children - (Ta for that)
• Hushed arguments between couples. (do speak up, I want to know why he’s never getting any again)
• The token dyke. (Oh wait, that’s me)
• And a couple of what I am sure were illicit meetings between people.......(fevered glances, and jumping when your phone goes off is a giveaway mate....)

What you don’t expect to see is what appears to be Victoria Beckham’s Mum sitting punch drunk at the bar in 6 inch stiletto’s with shopping bags from Harvey Nicks and AKA scattered round her, wailing and sobbing with large dark shades on.

Where do we get them from………….

Right. So most people have heard about Dad through the grapevine that weaves its way around my work place. A lot of people have spun platitudes. Some have simply been honest and said, ‘I don’t know what to say’. These people I like muchly. The ones I really love are the ones who say.’ Jesus Kate, that’s a big bag of wank right there.’ I don’t need you to make it better. I need you to agree its shit. And Crap and that there is an evil presence in the world that has aligned its forces against me and we must take up arms against it with an Army of Ninja Penguins and assorted snacks/chocolate/cider/beer and GUNS. Many many guns.

However SOME people tend to veer sharply to the Looney side. There is a lady in filing; we will call her Doris for this. She is a very lovely, but a very weird, older lady. She’s one of those that always has a tissue about her, and smells vaguely of TCP and mint. However, she may look meek and a bit wet, but FUCK ME, don’t piss her off. She’s misleading that one……..Anyway, I'm over there one day and the conversation goes a bit like this.

Hey up folks.... It appears normal service has resumed.

Sleep, Sleep, merciful sleep, is keeping me company these nights it appears! Hurrah! *huggles sleep closer to her so it NEVER LEAVES again*

You know I believe I may have turned a corner! I think the recent storm has passed leaving me feeling much more in control of my own emotions/brain/body/movements/marbles again! I am not one for dramas. I had enough of that attending an all girls secondary school. *shudders* However for one who really loves a quiet life I appear to have become quite the magnet for them!

The problem is it turns me into some sort of raving lunatic. I've been a nightmare to be around and feel quite sheepish when looking back. (I know I know it’s been traumatic but you know!) Where I thought I was dealing well with it all, I can now clearly see I was merely flailing my arms around in a windmill like fashion. Where I thought there was an exterior of calm, there was, well the painting of scream.